I Dare You #10... Write Your Eulogy

To be honest, this Dare is more like a “double-dog dare.”
 
Do you remember this particular type of dare?
 
Simple, everyday dares are usually presented as challenging opportunities to test your mettle. 
 
On the other hand, a “double-dog dare” presents a much greater challenge than the everyday, standard dare.
 
And my Dare for you today fully qualifies for that distinction.
 
Trust me: I’m going somewhere with this…
 
Admittedly, our curiosity stirs a bit whenever we hear the phrase “Truth or Dare?”  
 
Of course, as a teenager, if you had the opportunity to engage in this fun activity, you are probably well-versed in the creative and often memorable aspects of such a magical game.
 
Today, the magic continues.
 
But today’s Dare will likely surprise you.
 
After nine really good dares, I believe this 10th dare will truly test your mettle.
 
Today, I offer a Dare that has the potential to prompt a serious pause from you.
 
Yet, it is a Dare that, if carried out enthusiastically, it can dramatically shift your perspective from “here” to “there…” and then back again to “here,” albeit to a totally different “here” than the initial “here” that was “here” when you were headed to “there.”
 
Too many here’s and there’s?
 
Allow me to re-state it in a different manner:
 
In other words, today’s Dare could possibly forever change how you view this world – my world – your world – our world. 
 
As today morphs into yet one more night, and as this week marches into the next month, I wonder if our paths will ever cross again. After all, our lives hold no guarantees, except one. 
 
In fact, the United States Geological Survey recently reported that several million earthquakes take place in the world each year. Many of the tremors go undetected by people in the area of the quakes. It’s true: approximately fifty earthquakes are recorded every single day (about 20,000 earthquakes every year).  
 
Trust me: I’m going somewhere with this…
 
Hurricanes, floods, tornados, and many other natural disasters occur quite frequently… some with little or no warning. In the late 90’s, deaths caused by automobile accidents occurred at the rate of five per hour here in the United States.  And if you think you’re safe because you don’t drive, keep in mind that several thousand of those automobile-related accidents resulted in the deaths of pedestrians and bicyclists.  
 
And yet, we all remain aloof to the fact that the Valley of the Shadow of Death is not some distant desert basin. 
 
It’s your den, your driveway, and your daily commute. 
 
It’s your health, your home, and your whole neighborhood.
 
The Valley of the Shadow of Death is right here… right now. 
 
And pretending The Valley doesn’t exist… does not change the Truth of its existence.
 
In other words, ignoring the prospect, probability, and absolute assuredness of your eventual death does not decrease the likelihood that you will die.
 
So what’s my point?
 
More importantly, why is the optimistically realistic John Clark III talking about this morbid topic of death? Isn’t this blog supposed to be about the lighter side of life?
 
Indeed; it is.
 
And death is as much a part of life as is the air that you and I breathe.
 
Accordingly, today I Dare you to…
 
   ~ Write Your Eulogy ~
 
“WHAT?” 
 
Trust me: I’m going somewhere with this…
 
If you can find the confidence, courage, faith, fidelity, and freedom to write about the person that WAS you… you are fully equipped to initiate a powerful, life-altering transformation that can inspire you beyond any other event through which you have lived.
 
Yes: I realize that most people absolutely HATE thinking about their death, let alone talking about it… or planning for it. It took many, many conversations and years of prodding before my own mother finally visited an attorney and set forth a “last will and testament.” Every time I brought it up, she would do that “eye-fluttering thing,” and say, “I don’t want to talk about it.” 
 
And she didn’t… wouldn’t… 
 
Could have… but chose not to.
 
Eventually, she realized that merely planning for the inevitable would not hasten her demise; she is still with us, fluttering her eyes every so often, and still looking forward to tomorrow. 
 
Likewise, I beseech you to take a step back from the edge of fear, and take a faithful leap forward to a day that is sure to occur within the next 5, 10, 50, or 60 years. 
 
Invest an hour or so in thinking about what “they” might say about the person that WAS you.
 
Think about it.
 
And then write about it. 
 
Write about YOU: the most important person in the world today… and on THAT day.
 
And when you write about you, keep in mind those elements I delineated earlier in this blog: confidence, courage, faith, fidelity, and freedom.
 
Be confident that your version of the eulogy is the “correct” version.  
 
How can this be true? 
 
After all, aren’t other people often a better judge of you than you, your self?  
 
Indeed, that’s the point: people judge you. 
 
They don’t KNOW you like you do – and they never will. 
 
But you… the All-Knowing, All-Powerful amalgamation that is you (when it comes to you)… you now have the opportunity to set the record straight and complete those last several chapters.  
 
How? 
 
Well, the final record has yet to be created; your manuscript is still in progress. Therefore, your new edits can now make these last few chapters amazingly amazing! Dare I say, regardless of what has transpired before this moment, “You can (still) make the story of you a best seller!”
 
Indeed… Have the courage to make a few liner notes. These liner notes are those things that will not be discussed in the Final Draft, but rather those few things, habits, and characteristics you might want to change while you still have such a significant and awesome opportunity.
 
Have the faith to realize that you literally COMMAND a whole life ahead of you. Your life ahead is still led by one specific person: you. 
 
Was your “previous life” perfect (the life you lived before reading this)? 
 
Of course not!
 
Better still: NO ONE has ever lived “a perfect life.”
 
And for some reason, that last factoid helps me get past some of my greatest, uhm, lessons (they’re not mistakes if I can actually learn from them).
 
And while your previous life offered significant opportunities to “learn,” your life ahead is foreshadowed, if not launched (in a good way) or deflated (in a bad way) by your current attitude. 
 
With a self-written eulogy, YOU have an awesome opportunity to underline the things you have been known to SAY are important.  
 
Other people can undermine your current and future life only if you fail to strengthen your relationship with the most important person in your life: you.  
 
And like the various heads of state throughout this wild, wonderful, and sometimes-wacky world of ours, you probably have many advisors. But in the final analysis, you are the Head of Your State of Mind.
 
And so it is: You are HERE, today.
 
But one day, you will be THERE, soon enough.
 
I urge you to invest some serious thought into “THAT day.”
 
If you can do this with fidelity (a great commitment and an absolute conformance) to conceptualizing the day when you will no longer physically exist, you will have the potential to free yourself from four specific things:
 
1. Freedom from FEAR OF THAT DAY.  
Other than very real dangers, most of our fears over-rated. By whom? Take a guess. And as I have previously said, “Fear is created and destroyed in the same place: our minds.” Accordingly, as soon as we confront this very real thing called death, we actually move from “confronting it” to “embracing it.” More importantly, if and when we can view death as an inevitable component to this magical thing called life, we will miraculously begin to see how magical this life really is. Better yet, we will all be much better off, primarily because we will have stopped pretending like “that day” will never get here. It will.
 
2. Freedom from INCORRECTLY TREATING THINGS THAT ARE FAR MORE IMPORTANT THAN YOU CURRENTLY THINK & ACT.  
In other words, “the things that matter the most should never be at the mercy of the things that matter the least.” In your eulogy, your life matters will be clear. (Note 1) If your faith is paramount, your eulogy will echo this point of fact. Family? Friends? Food? Fun? What best describes you now? How will you be described then? Your eulogy does not have to be a mere postscript on the good things people might feel compelled to say about you; it can just as easily be an exclamatory statement on and of what you actually did. Do it!
 
3. Freedom from THINGS THAT ARE FAR LESS IMPORTANT THAN THEY CURRENTLY SEEM.
(See Note 1 above). Fill in the blank for specific examples. Here are a few examples to get you going: criticizing, complaining, comparing, and capriciously concerning your SELF with other people, problems, and processes of which you have zero ability to change. Specifically:
 
For every 60 seconds of strife we live, we surrender one full minute of bliss. 
 
And for every negative thought we embrace, we purposefully evict two constructive thoughts.  
 
Two?  
 
Yes… Two; and here’s why: 
 
The one negative thought obviously displaces one positive thought. 
 
But it also sets you back one “space” from where you could have been all along **IF** you had started with that positive thought instead of that negative thought. 
 
Think of life as a number line. From the time you arise in the morning… until you close your eyes at night, you can “plus up” in positivity, continuously, until you are far, far ahead of the negativity nuts.
 
But if you start your day with a negative thought, you have already taken one step back (minus one). You are already two positive steps behind the happy-go-lucky people who have launched their days with an expectation of great things to come. They will continue to move forward.
 
4. Freedom from FAILURE. 
Interestingly enough, though we are each an aggregate sum of our respective experiences, one particular experience or another can have a fantastically strong effects on our respective lives. This particular experience and the subsequent effect can be positive or negative. Moreover, this experience and effect, in and of themselves, are not necessarily important to anyone else. 
 
In other words: you, and only you, provide the relative importance for that one particular experience… or any and every experience in YOUR life.
 
Accordingly, you define your own benchmark for success (or failure). 
 
Yes: We are born, we live, and then we die. 
 
In between, each of us has the undeniable ability to create our very own Personal Heaven. 
 
We also have the distinct ability to create our very own Personal Hell. 
 
The creation of these very real dichotomies is manifested via the pursuit of our perceived needs, and, more specifically, how and when those needs are satisfied.  
 
Sure, there is an abundance of activities, events, challenges, and noteworthy causes & effects that punctuate the timeline nestled between birth and death.  
 
But for the most part, our simplistic existence is complicated by pugnacious atrocities called WANTS. 
 
These wants are then continuously defined and refined into perceived NEED. 
 
Such a precarious leap of faith from WANT to NEED is the first step in misconstruing a quaint, unassuming, and uncomplicated life into a series of painful lessons about what we need and what we think we need… a potentially and probable inaccurate perception. 
 
In the final analysis, life is painfully simple. 
 
Even simpler is this related thing called death.
 
Today I challenge you to embrace the latter event it as if you were planning for it.
 
Today I double-dog dare you to…
 
Indeed…
 
It’s all about YOU. But tell me: 
 
What’s your role in your soul, your goal, and for whom the bell tolls? 
 
Today, I dare you:
 
     ~ Write Your Eulogy ~
 
What you do with it afterwards is up to you.
 
Accept. Adapt. Achieve! ®

John H. Clark III is an optimistic realist.
 
He believes better development of leaders is what we (all) need.  And to be better organizations, we need more good leaders, not followers. To build better leaders, we must start with the individual (you, she, he, and me).
 
Described as “an innovative leader,” John teaches leaders, organizations, and individuals how to inspire each other. With a bold goal to inspire a worldwide community of optimistic realists who continuously accept, adapt to, and achieve the bold and beautiful concept of The Ideal Life, John is leading a movement to inspire people to apply his trademarked mantra {Accept. Adapt. Achieve! ®}.
 
An innovative business manager and retired naval officer, John is fascinated by leaders and organizations that make the greatest impact within their organizational culture and within the “real” world — people who “get it.” Over the course of his life as a military leader, corporate mentor, and innovative content creator, John has discovered a wealth of insight about how we think, act and communicate within our respective work/life environments. As a career naval officer, mentor, educator, and optimistic realist, he has devoted his life to sharing insights to assist in our quests to become better at what we all do – live @ work!
 
An optimist with a penchant for writing about realistic solutions to the challenges of everyday life, John is the author of 3 books: a leadership-development insider, "The Ideal: Your guide to An Ideal Life," a teen-focused guide, "Getting Out: Expert Advice for Today’s Teens," and the Christian-based book, "God’s Heartbeat: A Powerful Premise for Leading a Christian Life."
 
He delivers a unique and refreshing point of view to life's seemingly overwhelming situations. 
 
Through books, blogs, and everyday conversation, John's message resonates with an empowering blend of ideals that enrich, uplift, and “authorize” people to set and achieve goals far beyond current mindsets.  His trademarked phrase is a winner: ​

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